Thursday, November 26, 2009

Thanksgiving Day, Dinner for One

This morning, as I calculated the correct time to put the turkey in the oven, I find myself remembering a long ago dinner. It was my first holiday after my divorce and, as fate would have it, my little boy was going to be spending the day with his father. My friends were worried about me; concerned that I might be lonely and sad on this “family” day. It was sweet to receive so many dinner invitations but I just wanted to be alone. I had worked hard to make my new little house a sanctuary for healing, and I thought that I wanted to enjoy a quiet holiday.

Earlier in the week I purchased a medium sized turkey and had the butcher cut it in two; sticking half in the freezer. I brought home all the ingredients I would need to fix every thing that I was used to. Dinner for one? I had no intention of “cooking down”; I was making the whole darn menu. I could live on it for the next week so it would be worth a whole day in the kitchen. The night before I made my cranberry salad and made sure my turkey was thawed out. I had everything that I needed.

I woke up the next day with the flue, head ache, queasy stomach and all. I was so thankful that I didn’t have to go anywhere and that no one was coming over for dinner. I was actually relieved that my little boy was with his father. I could eat dry cereal if I felt like it.

Moving slowly but surely, I baked the bird and sweet potatoes. The rest of my planned menu could wait for another day. I lay on the couch and watched the parades and then the football games, almost too lazy to change the channel. But I wasn’t sad or depressed; I totally relished being slovenly. I was comfortable in my baggy sweats and only answered the phone when I wanted to.

I was feeling much better by the end of the day; the 24 hour flue had passed. I gave thanks for the quiet experience, actually stronger than before and with a knowing that life was going to be okay. Days might go awry, the menu might change and my head may swim with possibilities, but I will face it one day at a time.

I give thanks, I give thanks, I give thanks!

* annette

No comments: