Friday, April 30, 2010


My trip to Kentucky has been absolutely marvelous. My biggest challenge is happening right now ...Peggy has a flat keyboard and i am having a seriously hard time typing on it.

Yesterday, my scheduled blog day, we had a fantastic day. We started the morning by visiting several distilleries on the Kentucky Bourbon Trail. We weren't sampling, we were just getting our Kentucky Bourbon Trail passport stamped ~ at the last place i did practically beg, but they wouldn't give us a sample unless we took the tour ~ which we just did not have time for. We were slowly winding our way up to Midway, KY, to an enchanting restaurant known as the Holly Hill Inn. Peggy has wanted to go there and could not talk her family into it, so she had made reservations for us, and we were very lucky to get in so close to Derby Day. On our way we slowly drove through horse country and oogled at mile after mile of gorgeous horse farms, groomed to a "T" with beautiful horses. I am running out of adjectives at how amazingly beautiful this country is in the spring time. We were a few minutes late to the inn, but they had a quiet corner table waiting for us. The people and the inn (a converted old two story brick Victorian house) were wonderful, the menu was thrilling. It was a set price for a three course meal ~ everything sounded exciting ~ we had a hard time deciding. Of course we both chose something different and then shared bites, it was so much fun!

We then decided to walk the quaint and historic little Main Street shopping mecca, in part to walk off our lunch but also to catch some sun in the open plaza. I am not much of a shopper but i played the game nicely and had a great time! We got back in the car and decided "to get lost in blue grass Thoroughbred horse country" which we did so easily. Within minutes we were driving on narrow country lanes with beautiful farms, and enormous barns, and pastures of mothers and baby horses, and huge mansions. We found a little road that had no traffic and we just crawled along and squealed in delight at every turn in the road. We dreamed of owning such a place and fantasized on how we would run things ~ we were in heaven. We drove for hours and ended up by this enormous river, which turned to be the Kentucky River, and laughed our butts off when we realized we were just miles from where we had started.

Well that is all for now. I have to decorate my hat today, as tomorrow is the Derby. It is supposed to be 75* today and we are praying for decent weather tomorrow. Our fingers are crossed as they wrap around our morning cup of coffee.

See you later,
* annette

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Day Break

It slowly, slowly lightens. And it suddenly lightens and brightens even more. It begins to burst forth. A break in the day brings us to the beginning, a fresh new start where we may glow, and glow, and glow.

The Flatiron rocks, sitting the the foothills of my town are a joy at sunrise. The beauty of the alpine glow is a sight to behold, behold and behold, as long as it lasts. The remembrance may be short, but we cherish the moments and cherish them even more. We are grateful when the glow shows its gleeful face, when it comes out to play.

Monday, April 26, 2010

poem- Slices of Life

Spring, I prune the rose bush of her barrenness.
She rakes my naked wrist with her thorns.
Her greening will eventually explode into blossoms.
Meanwhile, I contemplate the red rows she’s plowed into my flesh.
What will grow here?

Shopping malls break ground,
Each one choking the landscape, same invasive species everywhere you look.
A modicum of community is built by logos we all know by heart,
Yielding strange fruit that leaves a familiar taste but emptiness in our guts.
When will there be enough?

Stickers decorate the bumper of my personal weapon of mass destruction.
Once I named my cars, like faithful servants.
Now I see plastic & metal monsters digging graves for soldiers, wheezing kids, and oil-slicked birds.
The WMD in my garage burns gas and the planet.
When will I stop driving it?

--Terra Rafael

Sunday, April 25, 2010

What If

What if God were to forget about this reality for one nano-second? If his attention wandered to some other aspect of the Universe and we disappeared off his radar screen, would we even know it?

Prema Rose

Saturday, April 24, 2010

How do I pull myself together,
after a death,
after an illness.
The clothes I wrap
around my body,
I pull them into some
resemblance of order.

I pull the sides of the jacket
tighter over the blouse,
so that it somewhat fits.
Tying the scarf or tie
so that is bears some semblance
to an order of dressing
that I once
was at the forefront of.

Pulling, yanking,
ordering, smoothing,
I bring myself to the world
again, and hope I’ve filled
in the cracks enough
to pass as normal
or at least to move
through the throngs
of everydayness.

I’m pulling myself together today,
enshrouding myself
in invisibility
to let myself re-enter the world
slowly, gently,
on my own terms.

I’ve been pulling myself together
all morning
and now I venture out,
hoping to make my way
unseen, through the world,
until I can stand
the world’s glare
and others’ stares again.


Thursday, April 22, 2010

Writing Prompt: Today I will....

Today I will enjoy the sunshine, warm on my back.
Today I will let this warmth penetrate my sore muscles and allow the heat to relax my tension away.
Today I will remember that in this moment I have everything I need.
Today I will practice being a detached, but conscious, observer.
Today I am listening to the birds singing.
Today, as I look at Patricia’s back yard, I take comfort in the yellow of dandelions, the green of the grass, the glory of the double red tulips and the sweet pink blossoms of the peach tree.
Today I am full of grace and gratitude.
Today I may splurge for the new designer black raspberry ice cream with dark chocolate chips that costs double what I typically spend.
Yes, today I will !


Wednesday, April 21, 2010


I think I came back from rainwater

Sprinkling all over the land

I came back from rainwater and was pulled to the ground.

I am pulled and pulled to soak deep into the soil

Blessing all living plants so they become fragrant and colorful.

I begin to feel a cooling freshness that notices its own beauty

A wonderful cooling freshness that pops me out of the ground

I come to explore what is opening to the planet, and then I come to explore even more.

It is spring with much newness coming with it, more and more and more.

I feel the lush unfolding, hoping it continues to grow and grow and grow.

As I know it will blossom as it only knows how.
Patricia Jordan

Monday, April 19, 2010

Writing with music experiment (**new music begins)

**A thickly woven tapestry was wrapped around her, as she sat alone in darkened room, contemplating the complexity of her situation. One inner voice spoke in an imploring mode, asking – “What will I do? What? What? Why is it this way? Why? Why? “ Another voice, somewhat playfully sang a lilting song in the background, relieving and hopeful. **

She walked outside into the sunlight, warmed by the orb blazing in a clear sky. Here she could shed the heavy wrap and the many voices. Now she felt the sun on her skin, the fresh air on her face, the ground under her bare feet. She smelled the spring fragrances of blooms, opening up, as she was, to a new season.

A smile began to play on her face. Her heart was beating calmly and steadily. Two bunnies chased each other in the grass, touching noses, then, chasing some more, leaping up in the air as though on springs. Their courting antics heartened her. She couldn’t help but laugh at them. And herself. Laugh at the folly of being human and trying so hard ** when the nature of life was still continuing. Yes, her troubles were still there, somewhere. But as Bobby McFerren says – “Into every life there comes some trouble, But when you worry, you make it double.”

She was renewed by Mother Nature, knowing she was part of the community of beings and the cycles of life. She felt strengthened and able to deal with her challenges, without magnifying them in her mind. **

Om shanti shanti shantihi

She sat under a blossoming tree and drank in the happy complexities of the world, ** letting the bliss of being arise inside of her heart, washing her aura with waves of fullness and emptiness.

So she sat for a timeless time.

Finally, glowing with prana, she slowly walked back to her inner sanctum.
--Terra Rafael

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Providence Provides

Once again, I am shown how the unseen hand of Providence reaches out and provides the very best for me. For several years now, I have been trying to learn as much as I can on my own on the internet, without spending money, about marketing and writing copy. This blog and the Week’s Worth of Women writing group have been an immeasurable help in gaining confidence in my abilities. Publishing two collaborative books and my poems being included in several anthologies have added to the validation that I am a writer.

This has been a dream of mine that has come more into focus through the last five years. I have envisioned a time when I am financially secure so that I can spend my days in some secluded spot writing and composing. Well, so far, the financial independence has eluded me, and to be honest, most days, I don’t know whether I can squeak my bank account through another day.

Now, the part-time job that I got six months ago is moving me into the direction that I had hoped to travel. It started as just a busy work kind of job, labeling bottles and preparing them to go out to the customers. It is fun and I love the company, Wishgarden Herbs, and, although the pay is minimal, I am so happy to have this work. There was a very long stretch when I had nothing.

The shift into being able to offer the company more of my creative abilities is emerging. This week, I started to write copy for some of their promotional needs. Yes! I am being paid to write!

In a week and a half, I am going to accompany the owner to film the training of her sales reps in Oregon and helping her at a midwifery conference. My years of experience as a midwife will be reemployed in another context.

I am amazed and in such gratitude of the Divine Mother’s workings in my life. I look back to a year ago when the whole world was crumbling into oblivion. Although I am not out of the financial woods yet, I see a light in the clearing ahead.

Prema Rose

Friday, April 16, 2010

Fanny MacIntyre

Fanny MacIntyre lived on Vermillion Road.
Each morning she rose early, acknowledged the sun’s arrival, and consulted her ephemeris, a book of planetary tables.
It wasn’t that she would have a good day or a bad day by seeing what the planets were doing.
It was more that she just took note of what energies she’d be dealing with…Forewarned is fore armed she always thought.

To Be Continued...

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Word Picture ~ My cat, Magic

I had only been in my new house for three weeks when my old neighbor called and said, “I have your cat”.

“I don’t have a cat” I replied, wondering who and what she was talking about.

“No. Really. I have your cat.” She said again.

All right, all right. What is going on here? It turns out that a cat had wondered up from the direction of my former residence and tried to move into my neighbor’s barn. It would have been okay except that there is a happy feline family living there already.

“She is very pretty, house broken and seems like a really nice cat”, she said, even as I was thinking, ‘if she is so wonderful, why did someone abandon her?’

I heard my neighbor’s roommate say in the background, “Actually, she is such a great cat, we will keep her and give you our two old cats.”

Since the title of the story is My cat Magic, you have probably already deduced that they talked me into adopting this beautiful being. They brought her over the next evening with a little bag of food and an old litter box ready to go. She was adorable; short hair, a little pudgy, with an incredible defined coat ~ a gorgeous shiny black, orange and white tuxedo calico.

I almost named her Dragon because of her amazing eyes. As she walks over to me her eyes are large, the irises are huge black circles encircled with a sliver of gold. As she jumps upon the couch and creeps up my tummy to look me in the face, the black retreats into dark dots and it is then that her eyes become so mesmerizing.

They are like the scales of a dragon hide, golden with a light green tint. Each scale is vividly independent. They lay on one another in overlapping concentric circles. I would love to count them as she stares straight back at me without blinking. I feel as if she is looking straight through me; but I am comforted by the thought that she must like what she sees, because she settles down to ward off the evening chill. We have become very good friends.

* annette

Monday, April 12, 2010

The Destroyer

I am the swirling hurricane, wet wind,
hurling against trees and edifices, reforming beaches and lives.

I am the tornado, twisting darkly through town, like a frustrated toddler,
throwing everything akimbo.

I am the earthquake,
rolling and cracking that which you thought was solid and dependable,
stressing all you have built.

I am the flood, sudden or slow,
washing away that which stands in my path
whether plant, animal, person, or possession,
leaving behind my thick layer of debris and mud.

I am the swarm of small creatures
undoing the knitting together done by man or Mother Nature-
uncountable numbers of termites, bacteria and molds,
waiting to compost even your body back down to the elements.

I help you remember the impermanence of life, enriching by destroying.
I help you make something new, after all.
I help you remember that which cannot be destroyed.

--Terra Rafael

Sunday, April 11, 2010


Scurrying into my tunnel of security,
Carrying my precious load of nectar,
Feeling protective of my stash
Of hoarded treasures,
I disappear into my unseen
Underground labyrinth.
Business is my modus operandi,
An illusion of doing something
Useful but less than satisfying.
Does this really need to go from here to there?
Does this feed into my subsistence living?
Hey, it’s time to take the time
To just bask in the sun.

Prema Rose

Saturday, April 10, 2010

A Day in the Life

I sail the seas
of my own mind,
meandering through labyrinths
the gods of Crete created.
Finding rivers of mirth,
I belly laugh into tomorrow
enjoying less serious pursuits
than Sirius the dog star suggests
as she sits in my living room,
having come for tea.
Relishing the moment,
I lapse into quiet
as the earth pauses
in her spin.
Coming to, I relax
into dreaming
across the threshold
of deserts and nebulae,
making myself dizzy enough
to sit back down on my throne,
the Great Pyramid itself.


Thursday, April 8, 2010

Jungles of Manhattan

Giraffes split the horizon like skyscrapers
strolling slow yet loftily, apparently unaware of
Anteater below built so close to the ground,
with his snout buried in dried mud hill
like a homeless man scrounging through a dumpster.

Hoards of Hyenas, howling and screaming remind us
of the din of downtown Manhattan traffic at lunch hour.
The enormous elephant rumbles towards the water hole
lumpy and heavy, reminiscent of a fat bodied bus,
appearing wider at the top than at its base.

Homo-sapiens scurry down side walks,
popping in and out of the coffee shops,
eyes to the ground or vacantly staring ahead;
already peopling the destination they are headed towards.

The lordly lion lies in the golden grasses surveying his assets.
All other animals move noisily around him,
careful not to make eye contact; to bring attention to themselves.
No one wants to be devoured by “the man”.

* annette

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

A Whimsical Poem

A small tiny gnome, I am

I run here and there, I do

Guessing at the numbers of peach blossoms

I wonder at the content of their glittering stones

Out of the tulip buds come by blood-related gnomes

The filling of pollen falls over them, it does

Then we all start to dance as the greenness and all their colors

open so bright, they do.


Tuesday, April 6, 2010

For the next week, we will be posting the poems from an exercise in Poetic Medicine by John Fox.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Three Short Poems on Food & Love

This love is a feast,
with foreign & familiar flavors
combined in new delicious ways.
I am well fed.


Fresh squeezed orange juice
served by a smiling goddess-
no peeling or chewing necessary.
We drink the thick sweetness-
transformed by living trees
& loving hands
into nectar of vitality.


My tribe had only flat bread
Until you gave us leavening—
A mystery that now makes our bread
Rise up, as though alive
And offer up more of itself.

--by Terra Rafael

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Angels in Form

There have been several times in my life when someone has miraculously appeared in the instant of dire circumstances to help me. I am sure they are Angels in form. This is an awesome experience that I am sure many people share. Usually they are only there for that moment in time, then disappearing namelessly into the background of our lives.

One such instance occurred for me when I was driving down the canyon on a February morning. There had been some snow and ice on the road, but that morning it seemed clear. I was driving what had been my mother’s Rambler station wagon, which had a penchant for fish-tailing. As I was coming around a bend, I came upon a patch of ice and braked. The car spun around with my rear end facing the center of the road and the front angled into the canyon wall. The traffic going in the other direction would not stop for me to back up and head in the right direction. Just then, a large white sedan with a short middle eastern man, chewing on a cigar, appeared. He got out to help me turn my car when a small truck sped around the bend and, seeing us obstructing the road, went between the front of my car and the canyon wall. He flipped over and spilled the contents of his bed which consisted of buckets of small screws and hardware. He was unharmed and somehow the truck was upright on four wheels. The man held the traffic until I could pull off to the side and see how the truck driver was doing. He asked if I wanted his name but I said no, as I didn’t want to involve him. I am sorry that I didn’t get it.

It turns out that there was another accident, just behind me on the other side of the bend. A car went into the rock on the same side of the canyon. If he hadn’t he would have plowed into the white car and it would have been a pile-up. I think the mysterious man was instrumental in keeping us all safe.

Months later, I was in the grocery store and I looked up to see him standing at the end of the aisle, just watching me. I looked all over the store to find him but he had disappeared. An angel, to be sure.

This is just one story and there are others. One, I will write about, but it is much too lengthy for a blog entry, perhaps a chapter in a book.

Recently, however, I chanced upon the opportunity to be an angel for someone else. I was traveling back from California and going though the security check with by carry-on luggage. A young woman of about twenty was in front of me and they stopped her bag to inspect it. Attached to the zipper, but tucked into the suitcase, was a strange device. It looked like a large fat metal pen with ridges in the handle so that fingers could grip it firmly. The tip was pointed. They began to question her and she turned to me and said that her girlfriend’s father had given it to her for walking across campus and told her to keep it on her key chain. Well, all the silent alarms went off for security and they told her it was a weapon, whose name I did not catch, and there was a $15,000 fine and imprisonment for having such an item. They brought the distraught girl into the center glassed area. I told her to breathe. Then they went into my bag. I was carrying an unopened jar of peanut butter. I had a moment of time to be with her, since they put my bag through the line again. I told her that it would be all right, as I knew it would be, and again had her breathe with me and put Light around her. She thanked me and I went on.

I have held her in the Light since. It feels good to pay my Angel dues forward.

Prema Rose

Saturday, April 3, 2010

A Letter to My Body: Jyoti

Dear Patty,
I'm addressing you this way because this was the first name you were given and this was how others addressed you in your early life.

I always appreciated how you regulated the menstrual cycles, never found disgust with any of the body's processes, and had the energy to respond to any stimuli.

You've seen me through five childbirths, several surgeries, a myriad of bumps, bruises, and stitches. You've carried the weight of my emotions, crying jags that lasted for hours as I felt outstripped by outer circumstances.

During the drug days, you suffered the hallucinogens I pumped into you, stretching your brain chemicals and pushing your envelope of reality. For this, I'm sorry and grateful at the same time.

I'm also grateful for the sensitivity yet strength of the nervous system you carry for me to inhabit and use. Just yesterday I had a long talk with mind about its huge impingement upon this small body. I told it that if it wanted to have a continual vehicle for its expression over the next ten to twenty years, it needed to back off and put its massive focus somewhere more benign than just running the nervous system ragged.

So, in closing, please accept my absolute thanks and heartfelt gratitude for being my vehicle of expression this time around. I'll try and be easier in how I navigate in these later years and find time for more relaxation and play.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Camping With Horses

Yesterday we broke a record in Colorado as the temperature climbed to 82 degrees.
I was stuck in a classroom in downtown Denver but I did step out at lunch to feel the sun on my face. Spring fever, full moon dreaming, my thoughts stray to all of the fun ahead for us this summer. I will never forget the first trip I went on with Larimer County Horseman's Association up the Poudre Canyon to Jack's Gulch.....

Camping with horses takes a lot of planning and quite a bit of gear. However, I was with five women and I had more experience than anyone. YIKES!! I had only been horse camping once ~ one time ~ with my sister and her (now ex)husband. We had driven into the back country of the Gunnison Wilderness Area and for five days I had the time of my life. My brother-in-law was generally just an ass, but he was actually an ass-et on this trip as he had done a lot of camping with horses. I learned a lot thank God, but I didn’t have any of the fancy gear he had.

But I must tell you, we women pulled our resources together and went to work. We did not have the pipe corrals that we thought we were going to have. However, within an hour, we had fashioned a couple of high lines that we could tie our horses to overnight. A highline looks like a clothes line strung between two trees, as high as you can get it, and you tie your horse’s lead line to it. We had brought our weed free hay and our horse’s water buckets. About an hour after we had found our camp site, we gathered up our chairs, poured ourselves a drink, set the camera on the hood of the truck and hit the timer. We have this great picture of us, with our horses eating quietly in the background, setting in OUR camp. It is precious.

* annette