Doors

Lately I’ve taken to seeing difficulties as doors. They open into a room I haven’t been in for awhile and usually left some mess at some point in time. It often involves some sort of hurt, discomfort, judgment about me or someone else. It’s a new approach. Instead of blaming the outer situation I look at what the gift for myself is. I don’t blame, though tempting that may be in some moments. I ask what I need to see. I open the door and look inside at something that I wasn’t able to see previously.

I recently had a situation where what was triggered for me was a deep sense of “I’ve done something wrong”. It was a very strong feeling where I finally turned around and faced it. The feeling was in me. The outer situation just triggered a closed door and instead of passing it by I stopped and opened the door. It was just old feelings of things I felt I did wrong as a child. It was stuck in there and as soon as I realized I created the situation to help me find and clear out that room I felt an immediate sense of gratitude toward the person who triggered it in the first place. Instead of blaming or wanting to fix something I let it take me to my own lost room and cleared it. Not by doing anything more than opening to the feelings, being understanding of them, and allowing the situation to be.

I think things are coming to us to heal old perceptions, hurts, wounds, whatever we hold on to that needs to go. We have huge opportunities to release our own narrow views, often about ourselves, if only we can seize these moments. Sometimes these misperceptions have been with us most of our lives. We’ve closed doors in so many ways. Now is the time to open them, allow fresh air, new thoughts, forgiving and loving thoughts. This way when something seemingly goes wrong I now remember it is an opportunity. It is a door appearing to a forgotten, buried or just shut out part, knocking to be released. All I have to do is open it and let air in.

Mary